#694 Screaming at characters in movies to do things
#693 Waking up really thirsty in the morning and finding a glass of water you can reach from your bed
#692 Eating the crusts of the sandwich first to save the middle part for last
#691 When you flip to a radio station just as a song you love is starting
#690 When the person scratching your back finds that one really itchy spot
#689 When somebody holds the elevator door for you
#687 Turning off all the lights during a thunderstorm (my parents always do this and then w e all sit on the veranda and watch the sky. Very much like the von Trapp family. It’s my best. Makes me wanna burst out into an off-key rendition of “My Favourite Things.” Cant WAIT for the new The Sound of Music)
#685 Taking the stairs beside somebody taking the escalator
#683 Finding a Styrofoam container with last night’s restaurant dinner in your fridge
#682 When your boss leaves early for the day
#681 Realizing you’re going to be in the background of someone else’s picture and smiling at the last second
#680 Falling asleep when the plane takes off and waking up when it lands
#679 Old school sugar cereals
#678 Sneaking cheaper candy into the movie theater
#674 When your laptop or cell phone is just about to die but you manage to run and plug it in before it completely shuts off
#671 Reuniting a sock from the Sock Orphanage Drawer with its freshly washed, once lost brother or sister
#670 When a stranger walks by and offers to take a photo of you and the person you’re with
#669 Vacuuming a dirty carpet and hearing all the tiny rocks going through the hose
#666 Giving people what they want
#664 Running for the bus or train and actually catching it
Juuust in case you didnt know: yesterday our esteemed president, Jacob Zuma, met with Moammar Gaddafi, the madman behind Libya’s chaos and the interview was broadcasted on Libyan TV stations, making it the first time the world has seen the nutcase since 11 May 2011. I mean Gaddafi, not Zuma. Ha ha. Although, why exactly we’re so buddy buddy with the guy is beyond me. I mean, I understand that African leaders supported us during the struggle blah blah, but solidarity should not extend in condoning grave human rights abuses and support for tyrannical despots. Anyhow, JZ emerged from the meeting saying Brother Leader is happy to commit to a ceasefire (just as he was happy to commit to one in April, which he then immediately broke) under the same plan the same plan that the African union put out to stop the conflict raging there. The rebels who want ol’ Gaddafi to step down, immediately and predictably rejected such a deal. Zuma didnt say whether anything was discussed about Gaddafi escaping Libya, since like everrrryone wants to kill him, his old pals, the rebels, NATO. More importantly, we dont know if the issue of photographer Anton Hammerl’s body even came up. This in spite of a heartwrenching letter written to Zuma by his family. Oh wait. They did say something. Apparently, “The Libyan government has agreed at “the highest level” to help South Africa search for the remains of slain photographer Anton Hammerl” buuuut this is according to the international relations and cooperation department, the same people who told us that Hammerl was safe in the first place. Seriously, spare me.
Winters Children: A Collaborative Photography Blog
I am no photographer, just like I am no writer/painter/stylist/musician. That said, much like you dont need to have been in love to fall in love, I dont think you need to be talented to love talent. I am currently obsessed with this blog that I randoooomly chanced upon, called Winters Children, and imagine my happiness when I found out that they have a tumblr blog too by the same name. I literally just spent all morning glued to my screen devouring all their pics. Beautiful and ethereal and looks like fun too. My secret desire to have colourful hair was the reason I decided to steal this pics and put them up. I wouldn’t mind being a forest fairy too though. Check it out here
Miles Davis. 20 years after his death, still revered. "A kind of blue", the greatest selling jazz album of all time is even an American national treasure. Today I hum a tune and feel grateful. Jazz is magic and I feel it in my toes.
A little while ago, a delegation came here from South Sudan to learn about the way we do things. Not many people realise it, but South Africa is like a pinnacle of progression to a lot of African states. Sure we’re not perfect but the ish we go through is nothing compared to a whole lot of countries. If you dont know about what’s been going down in Sudan, learn. Its flippen interesting. They have played host to the worlds longest civil war. 22 years. And the craziest thing is, these people (the delegation members, most of them quite high profile, like head of security blah blah) were so humble. I was sitting in the conference room and I actually felt overwhelmed. You know when you just look at someone and see that they have seen and lived through things that you can never even comprehend? Their whole lives have been shaped by war. And then they’re still grateful and humbled by us?! Madness. Anyways, so South Sudan is supposed to formally declare independence from the North (where most of the fighting is) in like June, in accordance with a national referendum (like a survey) where like 99% agreed, and the president of Sudan, Omar al-Bashir gave his blessing, said it was legal, blah blah. Yesterday, he completedly reneged on his word and attacked Abyei in the South, and has since refused to withdraw, saying that it belongs to the North. More fighting. The UN is involved. Their helicopters are being shot at. Its just madness. And why? Abyei is like soaked in oil. Jeez. As if the people of Sudan havent suffered enough.
"We are all worms. But I believe that I am a glow-worm." - Winston Churchill
I’m a bit obsessed. I’m going to Alabama. Dismals Canyon.Its one of only a few places where insects called dismalites can be found. The larval forms of these flies emit a bright blue-green light to attract food and mates. They cover the canyon wall. Wow. Wow. Wow.
I’m no art fundi but there’s something nuts about these photos, like you needa stop and think, is this really funny or is it really sad or is it flippen scary. Like its kinda disturbingly humorous, like I mean, there’s somethin hysterical and dreadful about being buried under the cushions of a couch. Or wait, imagine going to somebody’s house and seeing a body in the coffee table. Yoh. I dig the last pic a whole lot though.
Recently, I met a girl whose mom told her to make a list of all the things that she wants in a guy. So she obligingly did it and then forgot about it. A little while after she met this guy who has since whisked her away to I dunno Switzerland or something to have beautiful little babies and eat cheese and chocolates. But the kicker is a coupla months into their relationship, she found the list. And he was literally everything she wanted. Now, these things are self-fulfilling, I mean its not meant to be a checklist or anything, otherwise you end up moulding poor vulnerable boys into something they’re not meant to be BUT I do think its a beautiful idea and I’m a sucker for coincidence and obviously romance so I obviously made one too. I’m not gonna be stoopid and put the whole list down cos I know some retard will read it and try to convince me that he’s all I’m looking for. Mxm. Also, I left things like “Faithfulness”, “Respect”, “Honesty” off the list, that ish is a given damnit. Okay here goes. Ten points on my list. In no particular order.
1. Must have perspective.
2. Must love tattoos. If he doesnt have any, he must plan on getting some, or in the very least adore mine.
3. Must know all the words to Notorious B.I.G.’s “Big Poppa”.
4. Must believe in God. Religious affiliation is immaterial, I mean, most of us are born into our religion, categorizing according to something you have no control over is just dumb. My parents would kill me if they read this.
5. Must belive in magic.
6. Must help me cross the road. Chronic fear.
7. Must love music. But be open to different kinds also.
8. Must read books. Magazines dont count.
9. Style. Nuffsaid. White square-toes will you nowhere nigga.
10. Must always be nice to carguards and waitresses.
Obviously the real list is muuuuch longer. I know what I want. That is all. I now proceed to push all thoughts about this list outta my head.
"There is not enough love and kindness in the world to permit us to give any of it away to imaginary beings."
I’m not the most religious person ever, but denying God or justifying not believing in him goes against every single bit of moral fibre I have. That said, this is is a really interesting way of looking at religion. Sure made me stop and ponder for a bit.
I was trying to be done with this all-consuming blog, not forever ever done but like for the day, like to save myself from impending retrenchment AND THEN I FOUND THIS! OMG Polly-in-my-Pocket! I loooooooved it. I used to play with them in the bath! Remember this feeling?
"The Polly Pocket experience was challenging in every aspect. The first part of the experience was trying to open the tightly closed compact case. Apparently the makers at Mattel wanted to screw with little kids who were challenged in the area of hand coordination. I remember our peanut butter and jelly sandwiches were pushed to the side, untouched, as my friends and I would spend the entire lunch period, viciously trying to open our Polly Pocket cases. When I did get my case open I would sigh in victory and feel the intense burning anxiety fade away. For some reason I never remembered the method I used to open it, therefore the opening of the compact remained a permanent part of the Polly pocket experience."
Today, US President Barack Obama is expected to announce debt relief and other economic aid for Tunisia and Egypt in a major policy speech on the political upheaval in North Africa and the Middle East. Obviously his administration is keen to prevent the rise of Islamist states, everybody knows this. BUT! What you might not know is that Al-Qaeda have just released an audio recording in which Osama bin Laden praises the people of Tunisia and Egypt for their uprisings, predicts that change will sweep the rest of the Muslim world, and implied that the political changes present a marvellous opportunity for the establishment of Islamic theocracies. Amazing the hold that a ‘dead’ guy has over one of the most important men in the world cos this is quite obviously not a coincidence. I can’t wait to see just how much progress Obama is gonna make.
Note: I wrote this for Limelyt.com in my newfound capacity as a columnist. Apparently it was too harsh, so a sweet gushing version will be posted on the site soon soon, in the interests of maintaining good networking relationships and preventing vindictive retaliation. Ha ha. I’d love to know what you think of my piece? Hit me up. Also, have a look at Limelyt while you’re at it. Click here. Mr Limelyt, Damian will be putting up some cool stuff later, look out for a piece I wrote on Groove Armada. I like it a lot, its kinda dope.
According to Who’s Who SA, self-proclaimed leading guide to everyone who is anyone in the region,
“MIKA STEFANO is a social blogger. He is a personal brand that has become a public profile. He is one of Johannesburg’s most flamboyant socialites. He is also the person who knows the latest gossip and entertainment news. Mika Stefano is a young voice appealing to both black and white, gay and straight, male and female, rich and poor. By day he is the marketing and FOH manager of the Old Mutual Theatre on the Square.”
I was rolling my eyes from the words “personal brand that has become a public profile” but cynicism and judgement are most unbecoming so I’ll avoid making this a criticism of the guy, I mean jeez I don’t even know him. Anyways, it was his birthday party on Saturday night, which explains the need to Google him. If you’re still unfamiliar with the site layout then please have a peek at his blog, “The Mika Stefano Blog”, which is hosted on this site, and then you can really roll your eyes, as you will when you see the description “GP’s Gossip Gangster”. I mean really. Anyways, as I was saying, it was his 25th birthday party, expected to be one of Joburg’s hottest events, even featuring in the Daily Sun, which named it “THE party to be at this weekend.” Okay, that was sarcastic. The Daily Sun doesn’t even count as a credible news source. Nonetheless, as Limelyt ventures out into the world of entertainment, it was only natural that we had to be there to check out the vibes. It was held at the Pyramid Venue & Conference Centre, which is like in the heart of town, okay not really, but it’s in a pretty dodgy part and on the drive there we were like “HUH but now WHY on EARTH host a party HERE?!” Reason being, the theme was “Egyptian Swag”, because “The Queen of South African Online Media” decided to venture into an “opulent Egyptian themed soiree” and the Pyramid is the natural choice of all thing Egyptian. Excuse the pun. Okay so firstly, “Swag” should be deleted from popular vernacular as soon as possible. Please. If you don’t know what it means, you either live under a rock or don’t listen to hip-hop. Urban Dictionary definition:
“The way in which you carry yourself. Swag is made up of your overall confidence, style, and demeanor. Swag can also be expanded to be the reputation of your overall swagger. You gain swag, or “Swag up”, by performing swag worthy actions that improve this perception. A person can also “swag down,” by being an overall pussy and garnering negative swag for their actions. Swag is a subtle thing that many strive to gain but few actually attain. It is reserved for the most swagalicious of people.”
WHY is “swagalicious” even being used as a word? Like seriously, we have enough decent English words to not have to make up junk like this. Secondly, the Pyramid was an interesting choice of venue, as it used to be used for prestigious events like The Metro FM Awards and The Duku Duku Awards baaaack in the day so perhaps Mika was trying to revive the bang with which he burst onto the social scene. I remember everyone having his name on their lips like a year or two ago but this could have been because of the gazillions of stickers he stuck all around Rosebank advertising his blog. Nowadays, his name just inspires more eye-rolling. As I said earlier, I don’t know the guy so it’s not fair to be mean, and I have quite a few friends who are friends with him so I guess he must be a cool person if everyone wants to know him, but to be dead honest, no gushing just because his site is hosted here, his party was just pap man. It was supposed to start at 20:00 and when we got there at like 22:30, it just felt like a high school social. The venue is pretty big, with a decent sized dance floor but most people were just standing around, sizing everybody else up and of course there were a good few losers doing this through sunglasses perched precariously on their noses but questioning the sanity of people who wear sunglasses at night is already overdone so I’ll refrain. The whole affair just seemed to epitomize the urban club scene right now with everyone just concerned with what everybody else looked like. With regard to the theme, it seemed like very few people had managed to pull off dressing according to the theme because most were dressed casually, and then there were those who had gone over the top and rented whole outfits of corny attempts at funny and just failed. That said, there were a couple of really cool getups and I was particularly in love with all the gold headpieces and beautiful makeup that made alotta girls look real real pretty. But that was pretty much all that I was in love with. The birthday boy only rocked up after 00:00pm, and Ronelle, part of Team Limelyt and affectionately known by many as Princess NellyK, was excitedly speculating that “Maybe Mika’s gonna arrive in an egg like Lady Gaga! Or maybe those half-naked Egyptian guys are gonna carry him in!” Well Mika just casually strolled in, with a little bit of gold jewellery making up the full extent of his costume. I didn’t get to see if he had eyeliner on like every other girl and queen there (there were a whooooole lotta queens) because by that time I’d gotten fed up with the arrogance he felt entitled to show by showing up four hours late to his own party. So I left. Apparently the party really took off and was mad fun but in my opinion, perhaps it was a success in terms of a personal party, him being surrounded by friends, fans and mindless groupies who revel in being around somebody who is famous for being famous, but as an event it was a major fail. It completely embodied the vapid nature of what seems to be Joburg’s social scene right now: people just trying to impress everyone else by being seen with those deemed popular or hot, sussing each other out in the process and then coming alive when dictated to by the man of the hour. There really should be more to partying than this. I mean really, Mika Stefano refers to himself in the third person, should people really be glorifying him like this? In the very least, he deserves props for making himself famous for no reason but props for this party? I think not.
P.S. I really hope I don’t invite the wrath of the gossip queen, this is not personal and I am in no way hating. As stated, I don’t know Mika, I’m sure he’s fabulous. I just wasn’t impressed by his party.
It kinda feels like having the day off yesterday gave us a mini weekend in the middle of the week, with most people having gone hard on Tuesday night. Like ALL my friends hit the club BUT being the brain that I am, I decided to give that one a miss and rather have a movie marathon, complete with good company and even better nachos. Yoh. I’m talking like cream, guacamole, jalapenos, the works. And all this home made. Anyways, the movies for the night were:
1. The Fighter - Amaaaazing. Christian Bale astounds me and Marky Mark Wahlberg is sucha babe sheesh. Really really a wonderful movie.
2. Vicky Christina Barcelona - All I have to say is: Scarlett Johannenson’s lips and Penelope Cruz’s Everything. Wow. I was in love for mosta the movie. Also, I like it when realistic stories are made beautiful.And fyi, she isnt just amazingly beautiful, Penélope Cruz received the Academy Award for Best Supporting Actress for her role in the film.
The Democratic Alliance won Knysna, and Cope will decide who rules Laingsburg thanks to its one seat; the ANC and DA each won three there. The DA is claiming victory in Midvaal, the only Gauteng council it controlled, but that was not yet official. The ANC had just under 61% of the vote nationally, the DA just over 26%. The IFP, with 3% was managing to beat its new offshoot the National Freedom Party, but not by all that much – the NFP had 2.1%. Final results will probably only be available this time tomorrow. Well done my man Mangosuthu.
Jules: Mmm-mmmm. That is a tasty burger. Vincent, ever have a Big Kahuna Burger? [Vincent shakes his head] Jules: Wanna bite? They’re real tasty. Vincent: Ain’t hungry. Jules: Well, if you like burgers give ‘em a try sometime. I can’t usually get ‘em myself because my girlfriend’s a vegetarian which pretty much makes me a vegetarian. But I do love the taste of a good burger. Mm-mm-mm. You know what they call a Quarter Pounder with cheese in France? Brett: No. Jules: Tell ‘em, Vincent. Vincent: A Royale with cheese. Jules: A Royale with cheese! You know why they call it that? Brett: Because of the metric system? Jules: Check out the big brain on Brett! You’re a smart motherfucker. That’s right. The metric system. What’s in this? Brett: Sprite. Jules: Sprite, good. You mind if I have some of your tasty beverage to wash this down?